We Can All Agree to a Balanced Budget with Just a few Insignificant Changes

What a revolting development! We all thought we had until at least late January to do something about the debt ceiling. Guess what. Eliminate the deficit? All it takes is to eliminate deficit spending. It's time to hit the vested interests that are killing our fair democracy where it hurts. Debt ceiling? Why do you think we have one. We are going to hit it. No problem. What do you think caused this crisis in the first place? Let's start by selling some weapons and planes. As many as we possibly can to friendly nations. (Are there any other kind?) We can build and design them faster than anyone. No nation will challenge us in battle. To do so would be economic suicide. Let's follow through. And I'm not bullshitting this time. No more nuclear weapons. Ever. Who the fuck is in charge? Tell me we're not still building nuclear weapons. Not one fucking dollar to new nukes! The rich can bite their fucking tax increase. Live in the Cayman Islands if you feel that strongly. The rest of us will get temporary tax cuts. Republicans will be unable to oppose tax cuts to the middle class. Half of their base are wage slaves. We will extend unemployment benefits. But not forever. We are going to get this machine working again. We're not going to take people hurt by the depression and throw them to the winds. But we are also going to help those who do not currently receive unemployment benefits. That's right. We are going to help poor people who haven't had jobs for years or decades or ever. How will we do this without austerity? Without cutting "entitlements?" We will do this by eliminating luxury perqs and selling off the assets of the U.S. military and other bloated departments. No more travel. No more restaurants. No more hotels. Hillary already trotted the entire globe on our behalf. Nobody else needs to go fucking anywhere. Let's give the Tea Party their due. No more new taxes to the middle class.